originally published Singers of Strange Songs, Chaosium, 1997
16 year-old Mirabella lives with her ancient aunt in a cabin somewhere along the Miskatonic. And apparently she never wears shoes. She has limited education, I guess, yet seems to be fully literate and even familiar with obscure classical music. For a good time she makes out with her cousin Thaddeus, who's long-haired, studly, and going off to college.
One day, Auntie gives her a weird letter from Walter Gilman-Smith, Prof of Neurobiology at Miskatonic U. It babbles incoherently about Mirabella being the last Wendigo, and Thaddeus being the last Derby, and bringing the Spawn of the Winds, and drops the usual names. Mirabella doesn't get it and Auntie, who seemingly gets it, can't be bothered to explain it. With nothing better to do, she goes off and gets hot`n'heavy with Thaddeus, who wants her to come away with him to Boston. Thad has some kind of seizure, babbling the usual "ia! ia!s" and various names. Auntie snuffs it and Mirabella falls ill with fever. Thaddeus takes care of her and the two of them head off to Arkham, with Thaddeus blabbing about the Mi-Go coming from the Milky Way.
At Arkham, they find the neurobiology building has Cthulhu statues outside. Mirabella (who still hasn't bothered to put on shoes or socks) has some kind of freak-out. She wakes up on a couch in Dr. Gilman-Derby's office. Thad now has short grey hair and is a middle-aged man. Gilman-Derby has some kind of weird-ass machine with which he's trying to do ... something involving gold nuclei. There's more nonsensical babbling about Mi-Go and quantum physics and the Crawling Chaos. Gilman-Smith tells Mirabella she's pregnant with the spawn of the Mi-Go, and will give birth to creatures who will bring about the end of the world. Gilman-Smith tries to kill Thaddeus, but Mirabella stops him. She thinks she's giving birth. Thaddeus starts to de-age back to his normal self. Mirabella decides to have her child, and that she and Thaddeus will go back to their cabin and raise it.
What .... the .... fuck?
Y'know, when I was 18, I wanted to be a horror writer. And I remember writing this absurd story that was completely plotless, a kind of stream-of-consciousness blast of surrealism, that I momentarily thought was really brilliant. Then I re-read it and realized it didn't make a damn bit of sense and I mercifully destroyed it.
This story is better than my miscarriage - but only a bit. A bunch of senseless surreal vignettes vaguely held together by an obscure plotline. Are these things happening, or not happening? I get Thaddeus turning into an old man via the life-force being sucked out of him by the "Spawn" - but how did he get a haircut in the process? Why is Mirabella still bopping around barefoot on the streets of Arkham, till her feet bleed? Why is any of it happening?
And, as bad as my youthful fictioneering was, even I was able to avoid sub comic-book dialog like "That's all very cool, doctor man, but what does it have to do with me being old and Mirabella being attacked by hellspawn?" and "Have you ever wondered, my dear, what exists between the cell nucleus and the neutron star?" and my favorite, when Mirabella's had enough of Gilman-Derby's quantum physics babble: "Stop already! Stop with the scientific crap!" You go, Mirabella.
My god this is a terrible story. Gresh has published quite a bit, though most of it seems to be in the professional fan fiction type mode (books based on games, etc). I hope this was an early and not representative effort. Gag!
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